Embracing the Struggle: Lessons From a Life With Learning Disabilities
By Dawn Spence
Sometimes the best gift we can give someone is the ability to relate to their struggles and offer genuine compassion. Who better to provide that understanding than someone who has walked in their shoes?
My Journey
I’ve always had a passion for teaching, especially helping those who face challenges. That passion, I believe, stems from my own experiences.
Growing up, I had an undiagnosed learning disability. I often felt like I was dumb and lazy, plagued by self-doubt and frustration. While I excelled in writing, where my thoughts flowed effortlessly onto the page, math was a different story. Math paralyzed me with fear. I dreaded every test, every problem set, and every class.
The fear and struggle started in elementary school and followed me all the way to college. I felt stuck in a cycle of failure, believing that I was fundamentally flawed.
Finally, during my senior year of college, I decided to get tested. I needed answers—to understand why math was such a monumental struggle for me. On a sunny Friday afternoon, I finally got those answers: I had dyscalculia, a learning impairment that affects mathematical ability.
That diagnosis didn’t change who I was, but it changed how I saw myself. For the first time, I realized I wasn’t stupid or lazy. I had a legitimate challenge—and that knowledge empowered me to face it head-on.
Important Lessons Learned
1. Knowledge Is Power
Understanding my learning disability gave me clarity and the tools to develop strategies that worked for me. By acknowledging and addressing the challenges, I was able to improve in areas that once seemed impossible.
For parents, this means that identifying your child’s struggles—whether through formal diagnosis or simply observing their needs—can open doors to tailored strategies. Whether it’s extra time on tests, alternative approaches to learning, or assistive technology, knowledge allows you to support your child effectively.
2. Labels Do Not Define the Learner
It’s common for parents to hesitate about getting a formal diagnosis for their child. The fear of labeling can feel overwhelming. But a label doesn’t define your child; it helps unlock their potential.
Think of a diagnosis as a roadmap—it guides you to understand your child’s strengths and challenges. For example, a child with dyslexia may benefit from multi-sensory reading programs, while a child with ADHD may need short, structured learning bursts. These insights can transform how your child approaches learning and how you support them.
3. Learning Disabilities Do Not Limit You
Despite my undiagnosed challenges, I graduated high school and college with honors. It wasn’t easy, but my struggle taught me resilience and perseverance.
This is the message I carry to parents: learning disabilities don’t have to hold your child back. Yes, the path may be harder, but the skills they develop through those challenges—determination, problem-solving, and grit—will serve them for a lifetime.
For Parents of Unique Learners
Here are some practical ways to empower your child and support their learning journey:
1. Create a Safe Space for Failure
Children with learning disabilities often fear failure, as I did. Help them reframe failure as a stepping stone to growth. Celebrate their effort and progress, not just their results.
2. Advocate for Their Needs
Be your child’s biggest cheerleader. Whether it’s requesting accommodations in a co-op, researching specialized curricula, or seeking therapy services, advocating for their needs ensures they have the resources to thrive.
3. Embrace Strength-Based Learning
Focus on your child’s strengths and interests. If they struggle with writing but love drawing, let them create comic strips to tell their stories. If math is challenging but they love baking, use measuring ingredients to teach practical math skills.
4. Seek Community
You’re not alone on this journey. Surround yourself with other families navigating similar challenges. Online groups, local co-ops, and homeschooling communities can provide valuable resources, encouragement, and camaraderie.
A Final Word
As a parent, it’s natural to wish away your child’s struggles. But in my experience, those struggles can build resilience, determination, and compassion—not just for your child, but for your entire family.
Your child’s learning disability is not the end of the story—it’s the beginning of a unique journey filled with growth, discovery, and triumph. Embrace the process, celebrate the small victories, and know that you’re equipping your child to thrive in a way that only they can.
Spring always follows winter, and brighter days are ahead for your family.